Went to see Les Mis last night. Didn't like it (don't hate!) I shoulda known, I hate all musicals. Even Mamma Mia. Is it just me or were there only like three tunes? I thought a lot of the songs were samey, boring and pointless, especially when Hugh Jackman or Russell Crowe 'sang' it was like 'Yeeahhhhh alrite mate I get your point, let's move on.' And why did neither of them age? When Hugh Jackman goes to heaven and they're all there singing, that is not my idea of heaven. Everyone was dirty still. It's mean that when she's an angel Fantine doesn't even get her hair back. I think that Amanda Seyfried sings like a chipmunk, you know when you're sitting at the back of the bus and it stops at the lights and your voice goes all funny? Like that! And when she's with Eddie at the gate at night time and there's a butterfly? WELL I ain't never seen a butterfly at night.
Ok, maybe I'm being petty now. There were some things I really liked, like the girl who played Epipen or whatever she's called (I don't think it's Epipen, that's the name of the needle I gotta use if I have an allergic reaction to IVs.) I loved Anne Hathaway's performance, although in my opinion no one can beat Susan Boyle (I kid, you go win that Oscar Annie!) I liked that Eddie Redmayne's face was blown up so giantly in my face. And I looooooooooooooved Helena Bonham Carter and Borat, me and my mate concluded that if the film were just about them we would have liked it better.
So, no tears at the cinema, which shocked me because this is the girl that cries at Jeremy Kyle. I should have watch Django Unchained, that has Leonardo DiCaprio in it. Les Mis did not move me like people said it would, although basically everyone else was crying. I tried to do a Fantine on my mum when I left ('I dreamed a dream about your caaaaar!' 'No.' 'But the muuuurderers come at night.' 'NO. Get the bus.' Heart of stone, she is such a meanie Russell Crowe styley.)
P.S. To make up for disappointment at the pictures I was gonna eat my giant MilkyBar but discovered that someone had eaten it. Fookin' fuuuuuuuuuuuumin'. That is something to be miserable about.